Saint Christopher
April 1st, 2009 Posted in Pastor's corner, family, stella
Today would have been my son Christopher David Laurie’s 34th birthday.
But I cannot wish him a happy birthday, and that breaks my heart. Because he is in heaven and I am here on earth, thinking about him. Missing him. Heartbroken still, even after nine months.
I would like to tell you that it has gotten better, and that “we are back to normal” again. For some reason, people still ask me if I am “back to normal yet.”
The answer to that question is no, because our life has been forever changed. It’s a new kind of normal.
Some days are harder then others, and there is not necessarily any rhyme or reason to it all.
One thing is for sure: holidays are hardest. Thanksgiving, Christmas, and our own birthdays were tough.
But this day is especially hard, for it was his day.
What Christopher was like
Christopher was our firstborn son. Born on April 1, 1975, weighing in at 5 pounds, 7 ounces. I remember the day like it was yesterday.
Many words come to mind when I think of him:
- Loving
- Mischievous
- Extremely talented
- Opinionated
- Insightful
- Short–tempered, at times
- Very generous
- Tender-hearted and Spiritually-minded
He was an adorable baby, a cute child, and a handsome young man.
Yet surprisingly, he was not at all vain. He didn’t have time to fuss with things like that, because he was too busy living his life–Serving the Lord as well as playing with his daughter, spending time with his wife, riding his skateboard, surfing.
He was like a blur. He was always in motion.
Christopher did not simply exist. He lived life, squeezing out every drop. From the day of his birth, Christopher (or “Topher,” as we called him) was a burst of energy blazing across the stage of life.
Christopher loved to design, draw, paint, and even work on crafts at home after putting in a full day in at work.
The boy simply never sat still. Fun-loving, quick to laugh, and warm to people, that was Christopher.
He was loved
Because of my cold upbringing, I wanted him to know he was loved and cherished.
There were times that I admittedly spoiled him, but he never took advantage of it. He just seemed to revel in being loved. And when his daughter Stella was born, he surpassed me in the love he showed her. That girl was the apple of his eye.
It has been said you don’t know how good of a parent you have been until your children have children. When we saw Christopher with his daughter, we knew we had done just fine.
He has another daughter now too, who sadly he never met. He left us suddenly and unexpectedly last year, and not a day has gone by that I have not missed him with all of my heart.
Our last birthday with Christopher
Normally on his birthday, we would get together as a family and celebrate for dinner. Last year, when he turned 33, is still vivid in my mind.
Christopher went to work that day at Harvest Christian Fellowship, where he was headed up our graphics department where he was the art director. They had a Bible study with some of the people from our web department and celebrated Christopher’s birthday with food from his favorite Mexican restaurant in Riverside.
That day was Topher’s turn to speak, and he shared his testimony with them. Some of the people there had never heard the story of how he had been a prodigal for a number of years and how God had turned his life around.
How could they have ever known that would be the last birthday they would share with him? How could we have known?
Making up for lost time
But Christopher was making up for lost time and getting bolder in his faith, even having a Bible study in his home. One of his last texts to me was a request for a study Bible. We were thrilled with all the Lord was doing.
Last year, at his birthday dinner, Christopher told us that he and Brittany were going to have another child. Cathe and I were elated!
Then he laughed and said, “April fools!” We were crestfallen.
He then told us he was kidding and they really were having a baby, but it took us a while to re-adjust to the wonderful news. I told you he was mischievous!
He was so looking forward to that new arrival talked about it constantly.
The celebration of a life
Now, we remember his birthday without him.
You might say, “Greg, rejoice that he’s with the Lord!” We do, believe me.
But of course, we wish he were here with us, so we could put our arms around him and tell him we love him and wish him a “happy birthday.”
Saint Christopher
My Christopher David Laurie was and is a “saint.”
Now don’t misunderstand and think that I am saying he was perfect. No person is, and that is not what a “saint” is anyway.
The Bible refers to a true believer in Jesus Christ as a “saint.” So, in that sense, we all are. You can add the word ‘saint’ before your name too.
But today, I do not want to mourn a death as much as I want to celebrate a life. The life of Christopher David Laurie,or ‘Saint Christopher”
- Son of Greg and Cathe
- Husband of Brittany
- Father of Stella and Lucy
- Brother of Jonathan
- And child of God, now safely in heaven, having more adventure and–dare I say it–”fun” than he could have ever imagined
We miss him, but we will see him again. Until then, here on earth, we say, “Happy birthday, Toph!”
P.S. I read these verses today that encouraged me:
“In your presence is fullness of joy; at your right hand pleasures for evermore” (Psalm 16:11).
“For the Lamb who is in the midst of the throne will shepherd them and lead them to the living fountains of waters. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes” (Revelation 7:17).
Pastor Greg,
Thank you for sharing what the Lord has laid on your heart. Although I have not lost my son and can’t imagine what you feel, my dad and I were close. He was called home, oh, about 19 years ago. I don’t want to sound morbid or callous, but I just want to thank you for reminding of my loss. It seems that as time passes, it gets easier, with the exception of b-days and holidays. I thank the Lord for his assurance and confidence, as well as integrity. I’m sure I’m telling you things you already know, but I just hope you are encouraged. Thanks again, and I am always praying for God’s guidance and wisdom in your life.
Roger Hansen
Dear Greg,
Thank you for being so open and honest. For many of us, life will never be “normal” again after the loss of our loved ones. We give the appearance that we have moved on, and people may no longer speak of our loved one, but God sees our tears every day, years after our loved ones have gone to be in His presence. God bless you and your family.
Beautifully said, Greg.
Happy Birthday, Christopher.
Cheryl Person
Pastor Greg,
You and your family are in my prayers. I, too, have my first-born son in Heaven with our Lord Jesus Christ. You and your family are in the the Lord’s hands during this time of mourning. Even as pastors and long-time Christians, we feel the hurt and miss our sons. I pray for your wife, your son, and Christopher’s wife and daughters, for they are also feeling the loss. The only advantage that we have over others who have lost their sons or daughters is that we know where our sons are now. In time, and I am sure that you have told others in their time of need, we will begin to heal from the hurt and pain. We will never forget our sons, but we will be able to rejoice a bit more about where they are. The Lord bless you and your family. Thank you for doing the ministry that God has called you to do. So many people are in heaven because of your obedience to the Lord. So many more are going to heaven because of your obedience to the Lord. Christopher is one of them.
The Lord bless you,
James Martinez
Lord bless the Laurie family. And thank you for blessing me most every day as I listen to your program while driving to work.
Ron Vaughan
Greg, Cathe, and family,
I think you describe Christopher perfectly. Since he went to be with the Lord, I have prayed for you often. I have the last Christmas card photo of your family on my desk, and it reminds me to keep you in prayer. Thanks for all that you share about him and your family. There aren’t enough words to convey all of the ways his life touched people. He was young when he went to be with the Lord, but he touched more lives for the Lord than many people do in a much longer lifetime. God bless your entire family, and may He continue to heal your broken hearts. In His Love, Paul Havsgaard
I say Happy Birthday, Christopher, even though he’s no longer with us. I know God delivers the message. So I say, we love you Christopher, and we will see you there when we get there. But for now, enjoy the party in heaven. I say to the family, may God continue to bless and watch over you, and keep God’s promise alive. You will see him again, for he lives eternally.
Janet Wright
Thank you for showing us your heart. I lost my mother recently and every day the sound of her saying the nickname she gave me still rings loudly in my ears. She was an amazing pianist and loving mother to seven kids. We never stop missing them, but praise God we have the assurance of their eternal life with Him. It does get easier, but some days are just tough. Happy Birthday, Saint Christopher, we rejoice in your life with your family.
Dear Greg and family, I just read your blog, dated 4/1/09. My heart is heavy for you all. I can’t even imagine the hole in your hearts. My prayers are with all of you, as I know He held each of you in a very special place, in His heart. I also know that our Lord Jesus is holding him close until you are all united with him once again. May the Lord bless all of you and keep you in His loving care. P.S. He is coming soon!
Joan Kreutzer
Thank you for reminding me to not take life for granted! So often, that is what we do. We don’t make the most of our times (Psalm 90:12). We don’t realize how short and brief life is.
And thank you for reminding me to not take my loved ones for granted. You never know when the Lord is going to take them away, when their time will be up and their calling up.
Jesus served God’s purposes for 33 years, and then His purpose and time as a man was up. Your son did the same. (Psalm 75:2 NIV, Heb. 9:27 NASB)
Greg, my whole soul goes out to you and your family. You will be in my prayers. Thank you for opening up your heart and sharing with us your most inner thoughts today. I enjoyed your message last week on death and grieving. My mother, age 77, went home to be with the Lord on March 17, 2009. Your words give me comfort. Even though I am a Christian, a part of me has died inside. The pain is so real. I know Christ is there for me always. So I just lean on Him as He carries me through the days ahead. Please pray for me and my family as we trust in the Lord for strength.
Barbara Leggett
Father,
Thank You for all you have been and done so far with Greg, Cathe, Jonathan, Brittany, and her girls. In our painful times, since we are still here, we depend on all that You are and what You have given to us, so we can live the life You have designed for us personally, for what You have called us to do, in depending on Your faithful trustworthiness, to help us through these things in this life, to be able to go on in Your strength because of Your truths. We are thankful for the hope we have, and that we are free to mourn any way, any time, and as often as we have to. Our refuge is in what You say, and in the truth of Your Word. We thank, worship, and praise You.
There are some things in life that we experience that will never be forgotten: the time, the love, the relationship you have with your son will always be alive. Philippians 4:9 says, “And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”
I am so sorry for your sorrow.
God has appointed enough sorrow for us all here.
Praise Him, for we are eternal beings!
Woe unto you that are full! for ye shall hunger. Woe unto you that laugh now! for ye shall mourn and weep (Luke 6:25).
But in the middle of our aching sorrow, God’s Word says: Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted (Matthew 5:3-4).
May you be comforted
Sarah Pratt, MA
Keep on pressing in and pressing on. We are not promised tomorrow. Not one sparrow falls to the ground without Him, and we are of more value than many sparrows. We know that Topher’s life is no more longer or shorter than God allowed it to be. I pray that Topher’s life would fuel the many who knew him to press on. I pray that there would not be one milligram of wasted pain in your lives, but that your passion for ministry and reaching the lost and comforting the afflicted would burn. I also pray that you would be surrounded by the compassion and peace of the Holy Ghost. Like Jon Courson explains best, I pray that you would be bathed in “peace that passes understanding” and that God’s love would overwhelm you the more. Jehovah’s love for His Son Jesus would be a picture before your eyes as you “let go” and “hold on” to your son’s memory. Your ministry has blessed thousands. Through this loss, may it bless thousands more, until you meet with Topher again.
In the Name of the Son,
Chuk
Hi, Pastor Greg.
I am excited that Christopher is Home. He is in the midst of a great assembly! Many heart-healing hugs to you and your family and Stella! Those type of hugs are “priceless”! When my 26-year-old son Preston went home on August 27, 2007, two weeks after his 26th birthday, I cannot say that I was devastated. Truly, I was relieved, yet I did miss him dearly. God had forewarned and prepared my heart to be the strong arm for my family, so that when it happened, I didnt cry. I started singing a song, you may have heard it: “In all things, I give You praise, I give You joy and thanksgiving, at all times and in all ways, I give You thanks, I give You joy!”
With my heart and eyes on the Lord during this time of grief, my grief was softened and I could stand before the congregation of our church and give his “Reflection on his Life” message. I was asked by my pastor, Terry Harris, if I would be able to stand and do this tremendous feat, and I told him that I had already prayed for two angels to stand beside me and support me while on the stage. It went so well. Never did I have a doubt that I wouldn’t be able to speak of the love of God and the choices people can make. I ended with an invite to all in the audience, that if any of them didnt know the Lord and wished to join Preston and be with him in Eternity, they would need to do such a simple thing, that is, to accept the free gift of salvation!
Later, in my solitude and by the lake near our house, I broke down and resided in the verses of Psalms 18:1-2;6-16–He is a good and loving God. He reminded me of the pain He felt when He allowed and watched as His only Son died on the cross for all mankind. Then, in deep compassion, I cried for my heavenly Father and the pain he felt as one parent to another.
I will end this with, many heartfelt, healing hugs to all of your family and you, pastor.
April 1 is my daughter’s birthday. She turned 18. Her father is in heaven. Special days are so hard. Missing him so much. You are in our prayers.
Dear Pastor,
I know what you and your family are going through. Our first-born daughter Hannah, who was six years old, passed away the day before Christopher did (on July 23, 2008) in an automobile accident. I was driving the car. Her birthday is approaching on May 29. She would have been seven this year.
What you wrote encouraged my heart. I have learned to live as a stranger and alien in this world, looking forward to the coming of the Lord. May God bless you and your family.